Hey Guys,

I’m back with the last part of this Lessons From 2017 series. The fourth and last lesson I’ll be sharing is on the value of having people around you and letting them in. I’m one of those people who just likes to live in my own space, do my own thing, live in my head and just figure everything out without bothering other people about it. I like to listen to people and maybe even help them figure things out but anything else really remains in my head. This year I learnt to first, be comfortable with talking and having myself heard.

From the end of last year and all through this year, I’ve met such amazing people who’ve created spaces that pushed me to get out of my head, that reminded me that it’s okay to need someone else to listen or not to listen, to just speak and speak requiring absolutely nothing from you.


This year I really learnt to appreciate the value of having people or just a few close people to just be really there and it hasn’t been in huge dramatic ways but just in small ways. Simply by being present or being genuinely concerned about my well doing or laughing with me or sending me a quote or meme or a furry animal or cute baby- really anything to just make me smile. Small gestures meant (and still mean) the most to me.  These things show(ed) love, genuine friendship because someone remembered something or thought of you and went the extra mile. These things made it easier for me to let go a little. To not try and just do it all in my head. To speak up sometimes or not- to just say something was wrong even if we weren’t going to talk about it. My friendships this year made it so much easier to me come back to myself, to heal, to love, to learn things that would have taken so much longer, to laugh, to breathe and most importantly to pray.

My friendships reminded me that I don’t have to be the fixer- doing everything all on my own. As much as this is something I’ve barely mustered, I’m trying and I’m glad I have such amazing people in my life to be a constant reminder. A reaffirmation that I don’t have to do it alone. That it’s okay not to be okay. That it’s okay to need someone else to heal you- to listen, to sit in silence.

“It was not you who sent me here but God.” Genesis 45:8

Be Love and Be Light,

Michelle Malonza.




  1. This is so lovely as its also what I have been experiencing since my mother died recently. I cannot believe how wonderful it has felt to open up and ask for help instead of feeling I have to carry it all alone. None of us is an island.

    Liked by 1 person

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